“The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.” ~ Proverbs 18:22
You see that…the Bible says I’m a treasure! 😀
Like most little girls, I always dreamed of finding the love of my life and having a family of my own. I just didn’t think that would happen when I was 22, trying to finish my degree at Texas Southern University. I met my husband, Michael, my sophomore year at TSU. Our first date was…let’s just say, not that great. I fell asleep during a movie and I drooled a little on his jacket *face palm*! I thought for sure I would never hear from him again, but he called me that night and we laughed about it (to my embarrassment), he asked me out again and here we are 12 years later!
As a young girl, I loved school and my focus was always getting into university and building my own life. I was your textbook ‘good girl’ and boys were not on my radar, like at all! When I met Michael he kinda knocked me off my feet. I didn’t date in high school and this was brand new territory for me. What drew me to him was that he was different (haven’t we all heard or said that one before!). He wasn’t like all other guys I knew doing stupid shit I refused to make time for. It was just easy…he let me be me. He respected my hustle as a student and there was absolutely no pressure. When he asked me to marry him, my first reaction was, “Are you shitting me?? Dude, you are not in my 5 year plan!” But I was happy. I could truly see a future with him so…I said yes.
I didn’t know what the hell I was getting myself into! At 22, I didn’t know what marriage really was, I don’t think anyone really does. But it worked out, and we found our groove. Our marriage is far from perfect, but it’s ours. Even though I was young, I was an ‘old soul’. I was perfectly content with being married…bonded to one person forever. One person that I could grow with and continually discover. Someone to fight my battles with. Someone who knew me better than I knew myself and could immediately tell when something wasn’t quite right. A person to laugh and cry with, someone to raise children with, grow old with. The only person that could match my breathing, perfectly in sync. That is what my marriage was to me.
This union has taught me more about myself than anything else. How to be patient, how to truly help and serve another person, how to not try to be so damn perfect all the time. It was the thing I wanted to help me the best version of myself I could be. That is what it has done and is still doing for me. Being Michael’s wife is now just a part of my DNA, the makings of me. It’s made me a person who isn’t quick to judge, or who can see someone going through something and offer to be a sounding board, give a hug, or speak an encouraging word.
Marriage is the hardest, but most rewarding jobs I’ve ever had. It is true what they say that it takes work…I mean real work every day. You have to commit to keeping your relationship first. Before kids, work, friends, and family. Doing what’s best for the two of you, not what you read about or see on TV. Accept the fact that you will learn about yourself and your partner in ways you can’t imagine, if you get good at it! No marriage is perfect, and if anyone told you it is they are lying…and you don’t need the kind of negativity in your life! Its impossible. Uniting 2 imperfect people and all their ‘stuff’ is a recipe for a beautiful disaster! My marriage is a good thing, and even though there is much work still to do I wouldn’t trade him or it for the world!